Limerick Day!

Today’s cupcake is for the filthy minded who like to rhyme ’cause it’s Limerick Day! 

For starters, let’s get one thing straight, a limerick is not a poem (cue poetry rolling its eyes at the insult of insinuating it has any similarity to a limerick).  For one, a poem would never tolerate such liberal use of the exclaimation point.  No, a limerick is a verse, a nonsensical or bawdy or satirical verse. 

I’m a fan of the limerick because, like the cupcake, it does not pretend to be nutritious.  Limericks offer no insight into the depths of human emotion like poems do.  The chief goal of a limerick is to entertain.  With clever wit, a limerick only wants to make you laugh. 

Here are few examples to brighten your day.

The limerick packs laughs anatomical

In space that is quite economical,

                But the good ones I’ve seen/ So seldom are clean,

And the clean ones so seldom are comical.

There once was a farmer from Leeds,

Who ate six packets of seeds,

                It soon came to pass,/ He was covered with grass,

And he couldn’t sit down for the weeds!

 

There once was an old man of Esser,

Whose knowledge grew lesser and lesser,

It at last grew so small/ He knew nothing at all,

And now he’s a college professor.

There once was a [person] from [place]

Whose [body part] was [special case].

               When [event] would occur,/ It would cause [him or her]

To violate [law of time/space].

There was a young lady one fall,

Who wore a newspaper dress to a ball.

                The dress caught fire/ And burned her entire

Front page, sporting section and all.

A dying mosquito exclaimed,

“A chemist has poisoned my brain!”

The cause of his sorrow/ Was para-dichloro-

Diphenyl-trichloroethane

 A lonely young tree did family research,

Conducting a massive genealogical search.

Much to his dismay,/ He learned plain as day

That he was indeed a son of a birch.

My wife and I strolling one day

In the woods met a bear at his play.

                He was friendly and sunny/ Till I called my wife “Honey.” —-

Oh, that was the wrong thing to say!

Two brothers devised what at sight

Seemed a bicycle crossed with a  kite.

                They predicted—rash pair!/ It would fly through the air!

And what do you know?  They were Wright!

Your turn!  Happy Limerick Day!

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2 thoughts on “Limerick Day!

  1. There once was a girl who read, as soon as she waked from her bed. Her eyes grew tired. Her brain synapses no longer fired. And now she reads cupcakes instead!

    Yeah, I’m no so good with these!

  2. My favorite is one I heard when I was a freshman in high school:

    There once was a lady in Siam
    Who said to her lover, young Kiam,
    “If you kiss me, of course,
    You will have to use force,
    But you’re certainly stronger than I am.”

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